When we lived in Korea, A and I conversed a lot about the future and what our lives would be like when we got home, especially as we grew nearer to the end of our contract. We imagined all the things we would do, what our day to day and week to week lives would look like, everything that would happen. Now that we are back, and have been for nearly three months, I won’t say that it has all turned out exactly like the picture we created, but it has come pretty close.
We have our own place, but admittedly no puppy; I have a great job and A is on the search; we’re cooking almost everything we wished we could have in Korea; and we’re doing some of the things that true-blue grown-ups do, like pay bills and invite parents over for dinner.
Paying bills isn’t too new, but inviting my parents over is, in a way. In the past, even when I lived with roommates in an apartment, I still felt as if I belonged grouped with my parents. The apartment was just borrowed space and I never felt at home there. Home was where my parents were. Now that we are fully on our own however, I exist as an entity completely separate from my parents. My home is my house and I belong in my own little group with A now. And that, I must say, is an odd shift in mindset. It is as if I have finally crossed that threshold between young adult and adult, where my dependencies on my parents will continue to diminish and the nature of our relationship will continue to climb to more equal ground. A wonderful meal at my parents’ homes will no longer be only a great kindness, but rather a great kindness that I can give back to them.
And, I think it is this, the giving back part, that I am most looking forward to in adulthood.