It’s hard to remember a time when I wasn’t scribbling on paper. My affinity for office supplies has kept a steady stream of notebooks and writing utensils at my finger tips since long before I could even write a proper sentence or spell half the words I drew out in big letters. My true journey in journaling however, began on my twelfth birthday when my grandpa gave me my first diary. It was a Scooby-doo flower-power affair complete with a lock and heart shaped key, which I deemed positively necessary. With a little brother around it simply wouldn’t do if he could read all my important elementary school secrets!
The first year of journaling was spotty at best and filled with the drama of sixth grade- who liked who, crushes, best friends and the hot rumors flying through the classroom that week. Those short entries were short lived, though. The petty chronicles of elementary school turned to self talk shortly after beginning junior high. I had bloomed into a perfectly awkward wall flower and couldn’t quite figure out how to float through the social groups springing up. The journals from those years, simple spiral bound notebooks, contained notes to self (i.e. reminders of the way my English teacher preferred I write certain letters, particularly F) as well as thoughts on shifting friend loyalties, understanding my parents’ impending divorce, letters to my grandpa following his death and attempts at understanding suicide and why it was a decision made sometimes. In these writings I discovered a sense of security, the extreme pleasure in connecting with myself and the cathartic nature of doing so. This vein of journaling has carried, supported and nurtured me up to this very day and it remains a steady practice in my life, particularly when the going gets tough. Since beginning university, these tough-times thoughts have been kept in beautiful, ornate journals which, once filled, are locked away in a trunk for safe keeping. My most vulnerable self is contained in the pages of my journals while my braver, stronger self is here on this blog, ready to examine tough times through the lens of retrospection.
This public journaling journey is my first of the kind. I am looking forward to sharing my thoughts and connecting with others on their own journeys. I would love to hear from you! What is your journaling or writing journey? Feel free to share in the comments below!